Your Wedding Advice - StrictlyWeddings.com Blog

Must I Wear a White Wedding Dress?

Do not feel obligated to wear a white wedding dress, if you don’t want to. It is not a wedding requirement and many modern brides are choosing wedding gowns in a variety of colors from off white to royal purple and crimson red. It is true that for more than 100 years, brides have been wearing white flowing gowns on their wedding day, and it would seem that it is the traditional attire. After all, walk into any bridal boutique in North America, and you will immediately be inundated with wedding dress choices, all in white. However, take a moment to ask the bridal consultant and you may be surprised to learn that most dress styles can be special ordered in colors other than white.

White wedding dresses, long associated with virginal purity could be considered, by some brides, as overrated and outdated. In fact, there are a higher number of second marriages now than ever before. If you want to wear a wedding gown that is mint green, peachy orange, iced lilac, red velvet, or buttercup yellow, go for it! And it may be as simple as a touch of color amidst the white. It is your special day, and you should feel comfortable wearing whatever wedding dress best suits your personality, and a gown you will look back on fondly.

Gown from Neiman Marcus

Wedding Day Gratuity Guide

Gratuities are normally extended to vendors who have done more than you expected before the wedding day and on the actual day of your wedding. For sure this is important info to use, and you can pass along from generation to generation!

Put Some Thought to Your Gratuity
Reflect on the planning process and how the various vendors helped you with the details that led up to your day. Follow your conscience to determine what you feel is right. Be sure to clarify with your vendors if the fee for their service already includes tips for support staff. Since some establishments automatically add a tip to the bill for service to large parties, be careful to avoid unnecessary double tipping. If you choose to extend gratuities, here a few ideas to help you get them in order:

1. In advance, estimate each gratuity and then write a check or place cash into an envelope with the recipient’s name, and/or their title on the front of the envelope. The envelopes can be distributed to the appropriate vendors during or at the conclusion of services on the wedding day by your wedding planner or someone else you trust to handle on your behalf. An additional envelope can carry cash to make up for discrepancies once the final bill arrives and the percentages can be tabulated.
2. Write thank-you notes to the vendors who helped you throughout the planning process. Often, a sincere note of thanks is appreciated as much as or more than a tip.
3. Give the planner cash in an envelope and have the wedding planner discreetly pass out the tips to various vendors who have surpassed expectations.

Mandatory Gratuities
Transportation and catering always include gratuities (15% to 20%) in the total service fee. Gift basket delivery requires a $2 to $3 per bag or basket to have a bellman deliver to a guest room at a hotel. On occasion, hotel staff will hold a bag or basket behind the front desk and give it to the guest upon check-in, in which case it is wise to tip the front desk manager when you drop off the bags or baskets, just to ensure that your request is executed.

How Much to Give
Since all your vendors are in the service business, gratuities are a kind and generous gesture of appreciation for going the extra mile to make your wedding day perfect. The following list is of vendors that usually receive gratuities on the wedding day. Keep in mind that gratuities are customary, but maybe not a fit for your budget, you will decide that.

These receive gratuities most of the time:
Banquet Captain — Oversees the servers and makes sure your guest’s food and beverage wishes are met. Often acts as the head maitre d’ for the reception and works closely with wedding coordinator. Tip: $1 – $5 per guest.

Hair and Makeup Artists — Assists with all the beauty needs of your bridal party, keeps flow of group while everyone is getting ready. Tip: 15 -20% of the total fee, whether you go to the salon or they come to you.

Bellman — Assists with loading wedding items, i.e. gifts, flowers at the end of the night, luggage, etc. to your hotel room or car. Tip: $10 – $20 each. This is something that you an work out ahead of time with Hotel Staff.

The following receive a gratuity/tip 60-70% of the time:
Wedding Planner & Team — Assists with all aspects of the pre-wedding planning and wedding day execution. They often serve as the designer, director, producer, therapist, seamstress, dry cleaner, touch-up makeup beauty stylist, coach, consultant, honeymoon suite decorator, bell-hop and bridal party assistant. It is impossible to categorize all the services your professional planner is capable of executing. Tip: 15% of total service fee.

Catering Manager/Director of Catering / Food and Beverage Director — Assists primarily with the pre-planning of the wedding day and occasionally oversees the Banquet Captain on the day of your wedding At the hotel, they can usually make sure your hotel suite is upgraded, amenities are given and your stay is special. At a private venue or country club, they can additionally oversee the kitchen and bars. Tip: $50 – $500.

Entertainment — Musicians. Tip: $20 – $50 each. DJ. Tip: $50 – $300.

The following receive a gratuity/tip 50% or less of the time:
Photographer & Videographer — A gratuity can be given to the “lead shooter” and/or the assistants on the wedding day or on the day you receive your finished product. Tip: $40 – $100 each. This is just a suggestion, please ask your photographer about this in advance.

Florist/Designer and Team — Whatever the tip, the florist/designer should divide it among the set-up and break-down team. Tip: $50 – $200.

Meridith Griffin necklaces for Elizabeth Fillmore Bridal

We’re always excited when local girls succeed. We came across Dallas native, Meridith Griffin, when working with Elizabeth Fillmore Bridal. Meridith launched the Meridith Griffin line for Elizabeth Fillmore Bridal last October on the runway. She worked with fabrics and textures that inspired the overall look of the gowns that season. According to Meridith, “I use silk chiffons, light organza, and lux duchess satin from the same mills Elizabeth Fillmore uses for the wedding gowns and embellish them with vintage Czech chandelier crystals, rawly faceted crystal quartz, semi precious stones and extra large irregular fresh water pearls, draped with vintage silver and gold chunky chains.”

Meridith has since launched a ready to wear evening jewelry line in intense colors as well as crystal earrings in emerald, amber, cobalt with rose, gold, and silver wire wrapping.

As if she’s not busy enough, Meridith also designs wedding gowns with Elizabeth Fillmore and is director of Marketing and Sales.

You can find Meridith’s jewelry at Elizabeth Fillmore Bridal’s web site or call 212-647-0863. Her pieces are sold at Browns in London, Beyond the Dress in Seoul, Korea, Bergdorf Goodman and Saks Fifth Avenue in New York City, Warren Barron Bridal Dallas, among many others.

Top to Bottom: Amelia, Cami, Natasha, Odine, Yasmine

Bridal Events – The Adolphus (Dallas) and Jenny Yoo (Chicago)

There are so many fun events that you can go to as a bride-to-be. Our StrictlyWeddings.com partners do a wonderful job of planning such exciting activities. Here are two events coming up in the next few weeks. We hope you will take advantage of them and RSVP.

Jenny Yoo – Unveiled, A Bridal Soiree

One of our wonderful partners, Jenny Yoo, is having an event all Chicago brides will want to attend!

How to Dry Your Wedding Bouquet

Your bridal bouquet is one of the most beautiful parts of your wedding day. Wedding flowers are gorgeous, and often expensive, so it seems such a waste to let them die. If you don’t want to spend the extra money to freeze dry your bouquet, consider hang drying it. Drying is a super easy way to preserve the beauty and memories that came with your flowers. There are a few different methods, but the easiest is to tie a pretty ribbon around the stems and hang them upside down.

The trick is to hang them before the petals start to wilt or droop. This method take several weeks, or more in humid climates, but is the most fool proof. Save a beautiful piece of your bridal memories with a dried bouquet.

Information courtesy of EverythingButTheDress.blogspot.com.

Top 10 Trends for a 2009 Winter Wedding

1. Themes

Winter and the festive period lends itself perfectly as a romantic, family orientated and cosy wedding theme. Consider a less-is-more approach to your colour palette, silver and white with crystal accents can add some serious glamour to your winter wedding. Seasonal invitations could be white with silver snowflakes or a wedding invitation that has an embossed look of snow. The venue could be decorated with snowflakes and icicles and mini wedding bells incorporated into your bridal bouquet. The flower girl could throw a dusting of imitation snow on the ground and snow cones of confetti ‘snow’ handed to your guests. The bridesmaids would look beautiful in silver, champagne or ice blue with little touches of snowy looking white fur. Your wedding gown could be dressed up with a winter white furry coat. Snowflake wedding accessories are a great winter wonderland touch for your reception along with a snowflake winter wonderland wedding cake. It’s even possible to hire a snow machine, ice rink and create a forest of trees if you really want to!

2. Black and White

The elegant black and white winter wedding is very classy and is a popular trend for 2009. Why not ask all of your guests to wear black and white whilst the bride stands out in a bold burgundy or sumptuous fabric. The theme could be continued by use of black and white photography, using projections of old cine film or possibly a casino and black tie dress for all.

3. Calligraphy

Using stylised lettering or creating a monogram of your initials is a real growing trend in the industry. The monogram, acting like a logo, used to brand napkins, invitations, candles and tableware. Using calligraphy on the wedding cake is becoming increasingly popular and a step away from the plain white icing, floral and chocolate indulgences.

4. The Dress

Ball gowns and long gloves are back in style in 2009 and a winter wedding is the most appropriate time of the year to step into this look. The classic winter wedding ideas are usually focused around a winter wonderland theme, so a ball gown fits right into the opulence and glitter that is a winter wedding.

5. Pared Down Wedding Cakes

Wedding cakes have gone through a series of trends in the last few years, in many cases being disassembled entirely. The layered wedding cake is back and the current winter wedding trend is thankfully a little more budget friendly. Compact, but ornate wedding cakes made up of just a couple tiers are one of the biggest trends right now and are a great way to save money. These smaller cakes can be just as impressive and personal just like the cupcake trend or larger cakes that have been used for years. Play up the season with a white, vintage-style cake, dusted with edible silver powder. For accents, have your baker add a white sugar ribbon and crystal drops cascading down one side of the cake.

6. Beverage Additions

A welcome touch on winter bridal menus has seen the addition of hot chocolate with marshmallows, winter Pimms, hot cider and other warm winter favourites gaining in popularity. You could serve up white hot chocolate in small espresso cups and eggnog in small punch glasses for your guests as they arrive.

7. The Flowers
Red roses, calla lilies, and amaryllis are decidedly winter wedding flowers, but if you step outside the flower box you’ll find a variety of options for winter blooms. Consider fuller flowers, such as white hydrangeas and soft ranunculus. White boutonnieres can be handsome when they’re accented with greenery, but they also look great with a simple white ribbon. Add sparkle to your bouquet by wrapping the stems in ribbon embellished with crystals.

8. The Décor
Go beyond glowing candles to add both warmth and romance to your reception venue. If you want to heighten the drama, bring in the icy outdoors with ice-carved vases on your reception tables. Have your florist fill the vases with tall winter-white branches and hanging crystals to reflect the light from the tables. Surround the centre pieces with votive candles, and top your tables with white table linens and frosted glass china.

9. Favours

Food wedding favours are always a hit, but if cookies or truffles seem passé, try new treat ideas to send your guests home satisfied. Give out small packages of chocolate-covered cranberries or roasted chestnuts. An over-the-top idea that will undoubtedly impress: have your caterer set up a hot chocolate and marshmallow station to top off the evening or go for a candy station.

10. Honeymoons

While many couples flee the blustery weather for warmer and sandier locales for their honeymoon, a winter wedding can segue perfectly into a snowy escape. Embrace the season and rent a cozy log cabin for a week in Lake Placid or join the jet-setters at a luxurious hotel in Aspen for some serious skiing, wining, dining and snuggling.

Chicago Wedding Reception Ideas

Photo 1 and 2 from Hello Darling, Chicago, Courtesy of Artisan Events, Inc.

Photo 3 from Keith J. Laverty, Dallas,

Writing Your Vows

So you are going to get married to the love of your life and you want to write a beautiful, simple wedding vow for your ceremony, because you know the memory of those deep, heartfelt words will last for a lifetime.

These days it’s becoming more and more common for couples to write their own unique yet simple wedding vows. Here are 3 tips to help you write your own romantic and memorable wedding vows:

Don’t Try to Impress People

Some people try to write a wedding vow that is impressive and mouthful. They feel this will make their wedding ceremony more special. But the truth is that it’s completely the opposite. It will just make your words sound insincere and faked, so your wedding vow won’t have any impact on your loved one, or even the guests.

Simply speak from your heart. It doesn’t matter if you use very simple words that you speak in your day to day conversation. It’s the feeling in those words that matters. Because “what comes from the heart, reaches the heart.”

Speak from Your Heart

Go to a peaceful place so that your mind slows down and is relaxed. Then close your eyes and imagine that your partner is standing in front of you smiling at you.

Look into his/her eyes and remember the beautiful memories you’ve had together. All those days that you laughed and cried together. Feel how much you love him/her with all your heart. Then, as your eyes are still closed and you still see your loved one in front of you, think about what you would like to tell him/her at this very moment. No one else is there. Just you two. So tell him/her whatever your heart desires.

When you try this, you’ll find yourself expressing your feelings in a very deep and heartfelt way. These words will make the perfect wedding vow for your wedding.

Read Romantic or Spiritual Prose

Another great way to get you thinking is to read something beautiful, romantic or insightful. That might be poetry or it might be spiritual.

Let yourself be inspired from the author’s deep, romantic language. Write down any words that reflect your feelings for your loved one as well. Before you know it, you’ll be writing beautiful sentences that will be perfect for your wedding vow.

Photograph courtesy of Scott Hagar, Dallas

San Francisco Dream Wedding Giveaway

Think you have a good “Love Story”? The 2010 San Francisco Dream Wedding Giveaway – a 100% donated wedding philanthropy project put on by over 40 of San Francisco’s top wedding and travel vendors – is looking for one very deserving couple.

If you are legal residents of the United States and 21 years or older, then you are eligible to win a platinum-style, high-end wedding! Valued at $100,000.00, the lucky couple will get to experience the wedding of their dreams. Over 40 of the Bay Area’s most sought-after wedding professionals have gathered forces create a lavish wedding at Hotel Vitale, one of San Francisco’s most luxurious hotels, for the winning couple along with 75 of their friends and family.

Afterwards, the winners will head to Milliken Creek Inn in Napa, CA for a three-night honeymoon to include dinner on board the Napa Valley Wine Train, spa treatments and a private lunch and winery tour at Robert Mondavi Winery.

Liz Guthrie, the contest producer, and owner of San Jose Wedding Consultants, LLC says, “Weddings are expensive, and many people cannot afford a lavish wedding, especially given the state of the economy. We wanted to offer something back to the community that has been so good to us over the years, and the 2010 San Francisco Dream Wedding seemed like the perfect opportunity.”

The contest closes Nov 25th, 2009. The top five finalists will be announced on December 26th. The winner will be announced on Valentine’s Day, 2010. The wedding is set for May 14, 2010.

Visit www.sfweddinggiveaway.com to enter online.

Liz Guthrie is a member of the prestigious Association of Bridal Consultants, the nation’s oldest and most recognizable program for accredited wedding consultants, Liz is one of the few Certified Wedding Consultants (CWC) in the San Francisco Bay Area.